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My son and his family live in Dubuque. It’s close enough to drive to see one another, but far enough that dropping in to visit for a few minutes is out of the question. Instead, we keep in close touch by texting.
It used to be my son and I would visit over the phone every Sunday. It was a time to catch up on family and other news and I felt fairly connected communicating weekly. It was nothing, however, compared to the satisfaction of texting every day.
We gradually began texting more often and found we didn’t need the weekly phone conversations. Texting allows us to check in daily and it’s pleasant to have a little routine to start the day.
Our visits begin around 6:30 a.m. when he texts while he’s letting their dog out and I’m having my morning coffee. Lots of times our texting is mostly about the weather or how well we slept the night before, but we also text about plans for the day – his plans mostly. My plans don’t amount to much except for minor daily chores around the house.
Texts among our family are mostly conversations about general interests. It’s an opportunity to inform one another about appointments and future plans. Or to discuss worries about a particular issue, or pressure at work, or even difficulty in a relationship. Texting allows for checking on how someone is feeling today. Maybe it’s as simple as how much rain or snow fell the night before.
Texting can be brief, “How are you doing this morning?” on their way to work, or perhaps advising everyone to be prepared for possible stormy weather. We take advantage of group chats among family members in order to get word out quickly.
Sometimes, we write long texts – about a problem they might have at work, or news about someone we know, or something else related to a friend or relative. People may think long texts are silly, that “writing a novel” on a text makes no sense when the phone can be used for long conversations. That’s true, but sometimes it’s necessary to send a long and important message without disturbing them at work, or during a show they may be watching on TV.
It’s also nice to have a text to refer back to when there are details you wish to pass on to others. Like most mothers, I often act as an old-fashioned central-phone operator, passing on information among the kids about events in their lives they want their siblings to know. It saves them a lot of time as they are busy, and I’m not.
Of course, texting while driving has long been illegal. It’s been known to have caused accidents and authorities are much more likely today to stop a driver they observe texting. The new “hands free” law prohibits even talking on a phone while driving. I avoid texting my family members when I know they’re on the road but, fortunately, they all have vehicles that enable them to communicate without holding their phones.
Even when they’re working, the kids will text if something comes up they want to tell me before they forget. My son often texts over the lunch hour just to check in. Then in the evenings when working in the yard, or fishing, or pursuing his hobby of star and moon gazing with his telescopes, he’ll text to say how things are going. I think he’s also making sure I’m doing OK at the end of the day.
Texting allows me to live alone despite being disabled. By checking in frequently, my kids are reassured I am safe. They coordinate informally with one another to text at various times during the day, which means no one has to stop in frequently, which would disrupt their busy lives. My daughter and granddaughter, with whom I live, are in Iowa City during the school year, although they come home every few weeks. It would be difficult to be here by myself without texting.
My cell phone is with me at all times - everywhere I go in the house, out on the deck and next to my bed at night.
My son also installed Alexa to call for help if needed. I just have to remember to talk to her.