Opinion: A niche within a niche

One of my favorite topics to talk and write about is the Disney theme parks. I know this is a pretty niche topic, so I appreciate being able to write about it here every once in a while. I’ve spent countless hours reading or watching media regarding the past, present and future of the different Disney parks.

While the topic is pretty niche here in Southwest Iowa, there are plenty of other people around the world who love this subject like I do. Different Disney-specific influencers rack up millions of followers, some chatting about Disney overall while others focusing on smaller Disney niches. One such niche within a niche I’ve been loving lately is defunct rides.

Until writing this, I had only ever heard the term “defunct” used in relation to bygone theme park rides. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines the word as an adjective for something “no longer living, existing or functioning.” It’s often used in law regarding organizations, rules or sometimes even people. However, the first thing that comes to my mind are theme park rides that have passed from this realm to the next.

Some defunct rides have simply been rethemed, such as Splash Mountain becoming Tiana’s Bayou Adventure. Other defunct rides are abandoned and used more for storage than anything else, like Stitch’s Great Escape. Still more rides are completely torn down and replaced with something new, such as 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea Submarine Voyage being filled in and Ariel’s Grotto being thrown on top.

Some rides going defunct are more of a tragedy than others. I’ve found that I am one of a very select few people who mourn Stitch’s Great Escape being gone. This attraction was in a theater-like space where guests are strapped to their seats and are told they will see a demonstration from the United Galactic Federation.

Stitch appears and escapes his jail cell, causing mischief around the room as the guests are unable to leave their seats. He “jumps” on guests’ shoulders, “destroys” the technology in the room leading to a blackout and even “burps,” causing a noxious smell to spray in the chamber. Eventually, Stitch escapes and guests see footage of him causing mayhem around the parks.

The previous iteration was called ExtraTERRORestrial Alien Encounter, a much scarier version in which a cast member would be “eaten” by a rogue alien, guests being sprayed with fluid as a result. It causes a power outage and guests can feel the alien making its way around the room, feeling it’s breath and the rumbles of the ground as it moves. The alien is eventually contained, but being strapped down while a carnivorous alien is supposedly eating people in the room was too much for many people, thus the change to the Stitch theme.

Between the two versions of the attraction, many people were happy to see it go. Unfortunately, nothing has replaced it, so the defunct ride sits as a cast member break room instead. While people were glad to be rid of this ride, that’s not true of all defunct attractions. One that is universally mourned is EPCOT’s Journey Into Imagination.

Those familiar with EPCOT might try and say this ride still exists, but they’re only a little correct. The original version of the ride existed from 1983 to 1998 and featured a quirky man called the Dreamfinder, who taught the importance of imagination alongside a small purple dragon he created called Figment. This dragon was and still is a favorite for EPCOT fans.

Then in 1999, a new version called Journey Into YOUR Imagination came onto the scene, in which guests are given a tour of an Imagination Institute, excluding both the Dreamfinder and Figment.

It didn’t take long for fans to demand Figment come back to the ride, and in 2002, Journey Into Imagination with Figment came into being, the ride that still exists today. Here, guests learn about the five human senses and how they work with your imagination, with Figment causing plenty of mischief along the way.

While this has been seen as a step up from the brief version without Figment, this version of Figment is seen as a much more annoying and rude version of the cute little dragon from the original ride. Figment might technically be there, but many purists believe his true character is as defunct as the original ride.

It’s been quite a while since I’ve had the chance to attend Walt Disney World in Florida, but I’m planning a trip for next year that I’m over the moon for. Unfortunately, three attractions I was looking forward to will be defunct by the time I get there: DINOSAUR, “It’s Tough to be a Bug!” and Muppets 3D.

These are all being replaced with attractions based on more popular movies in the Disney universe, but I’ll be sad to see them go. While saying goodbye to a ride is always hard, it’s even worse when what comes next is a bad replacement. We’ll see how it goes for these three attractions.