April 19, 2024

‘Jist’ enjoy this silly stuff

From Birdie Sandeman

Creston

Is junk “jist” stuff too? Stuff, “jist” what is it? Do you wear it, eat it, toss it, pack it or hide it?

Fact is, the longer you sit the tinder you get.

Why is old age called the Golden years instead of ancient years?

Weather guys call 1/10 of an inch as heavy rainfall.

Spend many nights hoping mattresses are still on sale by tomorrow.

Another productive day deciding what not to accomplish.

Social life has changed slightly. Now it is funeral homes and grocery stores.

If not for baking soda and vinegar, we would not exist.

Why do people dye their hair? To look older or younger?

Phone never rings, unless I’m using it.

Never knew exactly what handicap means. I just use mine for cold ears.

OK, let’s change just to “jist” now!

Cats love dark holes. Friend decides to clean out older furnace registers. Friend get a drink in kitchen and cat decides to inspect the hole unknown to friend. She reaches down hole to clean it, and cat slaps her on the forearm. Friend will reach Mars in about 10 more days. Cat disappears.

Spent half my life trying to open stuff, first hands, then teeth, scissors, pliers, screw driver and lastly sledge hammer. That’s all!!

How does that tiny fragile soft magical, mysterious spore mushroom know exactly when to navigate to sunlight through sand, dirt, rocks, roots and grass and no radar?

Is football getting more dangerous and frightening? Talk now of shotgun and pistol formations are discussed. Should I be alarmed and what the blitz? Is it dangerous; will it explode and make my cat deaf?

And now the best stuff for last. Fifty-five minutes of weather and five minutes to teach a young guy “how to dump a truck.”

P.S. So “jist” try to remember some of this cool silly stuff!!