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Argus Hamilton

‘A spoonful of sugar...’

HOLLYWOOD – God bless America, and how’s everybody?

The Motion Picture Academy announced that the Oscars ceremony will go without a host for the first time in history. The Oscars is in three weeks and after that the town has to buckle down to business. It’s tax season time in Hollywood, and everybody is busy getting their Me-Too’s together.

Soap Opera Digest reported talk shows have greatly reduced the number of soap operas on the air. That world just marked the death of the longtime star of The Young and the Restless Kristoff St. John. He’s survived by three ex-wives, seven mistresses, nine illegitimate children and an evil twin.

Hollywood movie star Liam Neeson admitted in a jaw-dropping interview Friday that long ago he used to fantasize about personally killing African-Americans. And to think I just saw his latest movie, Schindler’s Black List. Sure call Liam Neeson a racist but have YOU saved a thousand Jews?

The Cleveland Plain Dealer reports that eleven Ohio kids were hospitalized last Thursday for marijuana they ingested not knowing that the Gummy Bears they were eating contained marijuana. The kids are doing just fine now. Over the weekend they were named the Best Jazz Band in Cleveland.

Governor Ralph Northam’s racist yearbook page unleashed a PC reign of terror against white privilege. Critics are attacking Mary Poppins, saying when she sings while covered with chimney soot she’s in blackface. To be fair the song was Just a Spoonful of Sugar Helps the Hennessey’s Go Down.

The Atlantic published a poll saying eighty percent of Americans think political correctness is a major problem in the U.S. Political correctness suffocates free speech and stifles honest inquiry. In Los Angeles city parks, it’s now considered rude to ask the parents of a kid on a leash if it’s a rescue.

President Trump in his State of the Union called on Americans stop fighting and start pulling together. Cable news might never agree to peace. Before Trump’s State of the Union speech, the Fox News website routinely abbreviated the speech as the SOTU, and the CNN website called it the STFU.

President Trump’s guests in the House gallery during the State of the Union Tuesday included a little boy named Joshua Trump who’s been bullied at school because of his name. He’s okay now. To make the boy feel less sad about his name, they sat him next to Billy Hitler and Hillary bin Laden.

The White House announced last week that President Trump donated his third-quarter salary of one hundred thousand dollars to charity. They reported the entire one hundred grand went to a group which conducts alcoholism research. Brett Kavanaugh said he would’ve done it for half that.

President Trump gave his State of the Union speech on Tuesday and again discussed border security and what he felt was the need for a border wall with Mexico. I say why not give it a try? Trump is so good at dividing us from each other, dividing us from Mexico should be a piece of cake.

Michael Jackson’s family denounced the lurid Jackson documentary for HBO that premiered at Sundance. He was greatly loved by young people. The day that Michael Jackson died, dozens of kids showed up at the front gates at Neverland, and after a while, the police arrived and let them out.

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